Today, for the "Women's History Month" project celebration, I would like to introduce this amazing woman.
Meet Karen Brown, 65 (today), Mom, Gramma, daughter, sister, breast cancer survivor, knitter and… proud of who she has become over the last 10 years!
“The secret of change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new” - Socrates
I began my life in 1959 as the first child of 5. I grew up in Northern Vermont, in the Northeast Kingdom (as it’s called). We were a close family and I am blessed to say that I enjoyed an idyllic childhood. My parents were married for almost 61 years and still in love when my Mom died in 2018. I always thought I would marry and have children. I had wonderful role models from which to build my adult life. I did get married a month after graduating from college and our first daughter was born one year later. Two more beautiful daughters followed and I felt that I was on my way to the life I had dreamed of. But… that life was not to be. Once my youngest went off to college and the “empty nest” kicked in, things eroded quickly. Raising three children had been our focus for all those years and we did a good job. We had grown apart and there was a lot of anger that went along with that. After 30 years of marriage, I found myself getting divorced. It was the bleakest time of my life. I had lost all my confidence, I had lost my sense of self. I was working full time and wishing I didn’t have to go home at night. I moved into a small apartment and realized that I had never lived by myself- it was scary. I had to find a new path forward…
“You may shoot me with your words, you may cut me with your eyes, you may kill me with your hatefulness, but still, like air, I’LL RISE" - Maya Angelou
With love and support from my wonderful daughters and my family, I have been able to move on. It has not been easy. I have worked incredibly hard to find my sense of self and to rebuild my confidence. My small apartment which seemed scary at first, has become my safe haven. In it are all the things that mean so much to me; pictures, yarn, needles and patterns, books, special things created by my granddaughters. A “daughter wall” where I have hanging, a beautiful cross stitch picture lovingly stitched by my oldest daughter, Sarah, a poem about Mom wood burned especially for me by my middle daughter, Emily and an amazing painting done by my youngest, Elizabeth. I have found safety in this space. No one to tell me how I should think or what I should display in my home. I find my time there to be therapeutic and so important to my well-being. I have made this space my own and I love it.
My greatest accomplishment in this life has been my three daughters and now three beautiful granddaughters. I am very close to all of them and cherish the time I am able to spend with them. Two daughters and one granddaughter live close by and I see them often. One daughter and family live in the Midwest so I have to travel to visit them but thanks to Facetime and text we are able to communicate frequently. I am blessed to enjoy a friendship with each of my girls. To be not only their Mom, but also their friend, there are no words for that… I am incredibly blessed to be Mom to these three wonderful women. Then, becoming a grandmother times three – wow – the most special thing ever. The love I feel for each of my granddaughters is truly heaven sent; “granddaughters are kisses blown to us by angels.” (author unknown) The joy of being a grandmother is something I cherish and I look forward to watching each of them grow into wonderful women themselves.
I have slowly remade my life… I have worked hard at my job where I have been employed for 16 years. My workplace has supported me through the ups and downs and I am forever grateful to have had such a positive place to spend the majority of my work career. I work for a non-profit in Portland, Maine and I have the best colleagues who have also become my friends.
Another of my great loves is knitting. Holding “sticks and string” through the hard times gives me something to rely on, something that makes me feel good, something that I can create and see progress in. I am an avid knitter, several hours per day most days. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed with learning a new task, but never with my knitting. Give me a knitting pattern and I will work at it until I conquer it. Knitting has been a HUGE help to me over the last 10 years. “Knitting is a kind of meditation, a way to slow down and connect with your inner self. From the time you first pick up those needles, knitting awakens something special and unique within you”. (author unknown) I wondered if I would tire of it but I have not. If anything, I love it more and more. I have knit numerous items for my granddaughters, I’ve knit baby sweaters and hats and donated them to a local hospital. I have knit blankets, scarves, toys, shawls and many more. I guess you’d say it is my passion.
During 2023, I was lucky enough to take a two month paid sabbatical as a benefit through my workplace. I chose to explore the world of fiber arts in Maine. I spent those 8 weeks visiting yarn shops, sheep farms, quilting shops, art galleries and museums. I saw indigenous baskets, beautiful quilts, a folk-art exhibition and all sorts of wonderful knitted items. It was a happy time and even though driving to new places around the state was a little scary, I did it! I also learned how to use the navigation system in my car. My kids SAID it was easy!
In October 2023, I fulfilled a long time “bucket list” goal, and stood on top of Cadillac Mountain in Acadia National Park at sunrise with my youngest daughter. The feeling of empowerment that morning was almost overwhelming. For so long, I didn’t believe I could do things like that, I didn’t have a bucket list and frankly, was just trying to survive each day. But now I can and I am and it feels really good.
There are still hard days. Days when I feel doubt. Days when I feel anxious. Days when I think, “this is NOT the way my life should be as I turn 65”. But, this IS my life now and maybe this is how it IS supposed to be. As I look toward retirement (in Spring 2026) I have hope for the future.
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Thank you, Karen, for sharing your story and empowering others!
#womenshistorymonth #womansupportingwomen #womanpower #mainephotographer
1 Comments
Apr 3, 2024, 7:18:15 AM
Mike Brown - Beautifully written, and a life to be proud of, with much more joy to come. You make me proud to be your brother! Love. Mike